That it May Bless… by Susie
Well hello dear friends! I’ve missed you!
Praise God for the summer break because, folks, come June I was sincerely “limping across the finish line.” Forgive the stolen quote from Jen Hatmaker and her hilarious blog post about the sheer state of exhaustion us moms can find ourselves in by the time the last few weeks of school arrive, but it was so true!
Jen said she tapped out in April. Yup -me too. Last blog post was mid-April. I had nothing people. I mean, Nu-thing! Well there are 96 drafts and a whole bunch of ideas and good intentions but I’ve got zero in terms of delivery. See this chair? Full of book recommendations to share with you and discipleship plans for the kiddos. And yes that is a battery and some alligator clips for a fantastic devotional. I even have a few treasures saved for some giveaways. Big hopes, lots of dreams, sincere plans, much enthusiasm… but Zip, Zero, Zilch made it into your inbox this summer.
Oh and this is my nightstand. For real. Not kidding at all. Those are just the books that I intend to read or re-read right now and then share some of them with you. Like tonight! For the love, I’ve got them piled up there like I can plow through one a night! Some fluff, some gems, some deeply significant, some just for fun. And the pile keeps growing…
Actually, there is a deeper reason to the virtual pause button that was pressed on this happy little blogging venture that I’ve enjoyed so much. There was more to it than sheer exhaustion combined with over-ambitious “heart-eyes” that were bigger than my limited capacity “energy- stomach”. (Does that metaphor even work?) You see during the month of May, it seemed as though I couldn’t listen a radio segment, read a blog post, or skim an email that didn’t address the issue of women struggling with perfectionism. Most of the blame was laid on social media and the filtered hue through which we view each others’ lives. Phrases like “Pinterest Perfect” haunted me. Others bemoaned the evils of Facebook and Blog posts as simply ways to flaunt our lives in front of each other leaving us all depressed and discouraged. UGH! I felt sick! Could my blogging posts that have been written with the sincere desire to generate excitement and encouragement to partner with our God and churches to “RAISE up our children with DEEP ROOTS in the word of God the person of Jesus” merely depressing and discouraging my beloved friends and sisters? Please no Lord!
A fellow blogger said it well :
“Deep down I struggle with blogging because I don’t want people to think I am boasting about myself or that I think I am amazing. I’m pretty much a big pile of nothingness with nothing to offer, but God. How do I blog about my life without people inwardly rolling their eyes?” – Jen Barry
And so I paused. I waited. I prayed.
I entitled this post “THAT IT MAY BLESS ” for two reasons. One, because for a while I thought that was the name of a friend’s new blog and I loved it! Turns out, upon more careful reading, that her blog is entitled, Thatimaybeless. Love that title even more and it is perfect for the sweet blog that Emily writes with vulnerability and humility. Second, and more importantly, because that is truly my deepest desire – that these humble offerings of resources, ideas and outpourings of the heart would truly bless you and your family.
I am not fooling myself. I know I’m not a writer. I’m a thinker and a ponderer who loves to mentally compose blog posts in the shower. I’m a physicist who was trained to problem-solve and derive formulas and who in University didn’t write a single essay or paper besides my tech-heavy master’s thesis. I have no burning desire inside me that spurs me on to write. I could easily live without writing because I actually do enjoy the inside of my own head 🙂
But here’s the deal. I do know I am a SHARER. I find a book I love and I want to SHARE it with you THAT IT MAY BLESS you. I have a successful family devotional night and I want to call you up and SHARE and say try this one out THAT IT MAY BLESS your family too. I have a particularly significant epiphany moment in my head in the shower and I pray and ask God to turn my jumbled thoughts into a coherent string of sentences so THAT IT MAY BLESS you.
There you have it. I think I’m ready now to un-pause the blogging button, all the while praying that you might be encouraged and equipped, and me along with you. No more worrying about creating more media noise in a world filled with zillions of blog posts. I’m going to do it anyways (See Sara Bessey’s post below). And also praying, “That I May Be Less” so that Christ is more – in me, in you, and in our children.
And while I’m on the topic of sharing. Here are some other posts that inspired and blessed me recently and I’m sharing them with you here THAT IT MAY BLESS you 🙂
(ok that one is old – I just keep reading it and re-reading it over again)
That you may be blessed…